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Brian W.

Brian W.

Growing up I've never been one to finish anything. I always quit what I had started. I've had a rough adult hood. I married at a young age, and started a family. When my newborn son was 9 months old my wife left us to fend for ourselves never to be heard from again. That had forced me to drop out of college to be work full time and be a full time single dad. During the next few years i subjected myself to abuse from bad on and off relationships. It had goten to the point where my family borderline disowned me. It got to the point where I cried myself to sleep cause I couldn't provide the kind of life for my son that he deserved and thought that if i was gone for good he'd be better off. After contemplating suicide I had an intervention of sorts. My son had turned on the tv and i've witnessed the ultimate fighter for the first time and thought to myself I always wanted to do something like that. That's how my jiujitsu journey started. I reached out to my cousin who had brought to his mma gym and i was hooked from day 1. I wanted to do this to show to my son that you can make something of yourself. I also wanted to show my father that i wasn't a loser and a quitter my whole life that i was more than that. As the next few years progressed i had found a stable job a good women to share my life with and care for my son with me and support this journey i had started. During this journey i had grown close with my dad which i've never been in my adolescence. And after receiving my blue belt my family had to sit me down to break it to me that my father had been diagnosed with a malignant form of cancer that acted like leukemia (burkits lymphoma). This hit me hard i wanted to quit jiujitsu and spend more time with him never knowing how much time we have here on this earth. But he wouldn't let me. Over the course of the next few months i tried my hardest to make him proud competing and showing him i'm not the quitter i once was. I also gotten into raising money with Tap Cancer Out to help fight nasty diseases like what plagued my dad. I was featured in one of tap cancer outs videos that shared stories of people who have been affected by cancer. My dad had surprised me by showing up to the tournament in CT that day they interviewed me. It was the first time and last i got to genuinely spend time with him. His cancer took a turn for the worst. Over the next few months and he was rushed to the hospital without warning. I got to the hospital in time right before they had intubated him and got to be the last person he ever saw or talked to. I promised him as he was being intubated that no matter what I will do something great to make you proud. His last words to me were "you don't have to, i love you". He never woke up from the induced coma and i had to be the one to sign off on the decision of taking him off life support. He passed shortly after. I struggled with the financial burden that was brought on with his untimely death with the combination of emotion al distress that hurt so much that i felt like slipping into my old ways. My dad was 44 years old. I still see him in my dreams and he made me assure him that no matter what i will keep my head up. I will fulfill my promise to make him proud not only with trying to be a better father of now 3 kids, but to succeed in something i set my heart on early on. In my eyes thats becoming a world champion in jiujitsu. And hopefully with your guys help i can keep that promise to my father up in heaven. This was one of the hardest things ive done typing this out because i haven't opened up to anyone like this since his death so thank you for listening

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